Interesting prospect

I overheard a couple of guys talking at work today.

One was telling the other that Mayo Clinic is looking for younger men to donate their testicles for stem cell research.
Supposedly, they offer $80,000 per "boy".

If this is true, I may have to call the ex and see if I can get mine back!

There goes the neighborhood

I was surprised when I looked at the local/area newspaper to find that an area man stated he is the leader of a Ku Klux Klan chapter.
He went on to state that he plans to hold a demonstration in the State Capitol against same-sex marriage.
While I'm taken aback to learn that the KKK is alive and well in North Iowa (as well as a group of hate-mongering pinheads can be)I can't believe that there is a chapter in North Iowa!

Last rant of '05

I've had a subject looming around my head for sometime, but have not had a coherent enough string to be able to post. However, while still not well put together, I wanted to get it out before the new year.

Single Dads:getting the short end of the stick.

As a single Dad, and having friends that are single Dads, I can state with a certain amount of knowledge, that something must be done to gain us better rights when it comes to our children.

More times than none, when it comes to divorce and placement of our children, primary custody is awarded to the mother. It seems that as of late, however, some judges are awarding a shared or 50/50 placement. But, this is a rather new concept and not all judges are willing to go this route, as legislature only suggested this and has not passed down any guidelines for judges to follow.

On that note, single fathers are subjected to a wide variety of pangs from seeing their children being 'fathered' by someone NOT themselves to traveling great distances (if the divorce resulted in one of the parents moving) to see/get their children for a weekend. A move will also result in Dad missing out on a lot of their children's lives from not being able to attend any sport or music program that child may be involved in to just everyday situations a Dad would normally get to enjoy with their child.

Usually, it is the father that is told when they get to see their children (in the form of "visitation", which sometimes will result in the father being considered nothing more than a "big-brother".
We are assigned an amount to be paid to the mother in the form of "child-support", with the mother being given carte blanche in spending said support any way she deems fit.
Sometimes, the money will in fact be spent on the children, with other times the mother is seen with new clothes, cars, freshly done nails and hair on a weekly basis.
On the other side of the coin, the father is left to figure out how to fend for oneself on a partial income.

On a personal note, I have nothing against the idea of child-support. I'd just like to see some accountability on how it's spent to make sure it is going to the child.
But when a father is trying to make ends meet and the mother continues to ask for "extra assistance" in things like going halfsies on something in addition to the child support is a little out of line.

Now, personally, and this may ruffle a few feathers, I feel that with the divorce rates of today which results in creating "step-families", the result on "the big picture" of the world will be the downfall of our economic society. (ok, that was a bit dramatic but I couldn't come up with a feasible statement).

Basically, what I'm getting at is as we get older, more and more Americans are getting married only to end up in divorce.

When there are children involved, they become exposed to "another parent", maybe several in a span (due to the parent dating),and as we all know our children learn from experience, which could mean that in the future all marriage will be done away with from the knowledge that "it won't last anyway".

Children are having someone other than their own parent raise them and are in some cases, being told to respect this person only to have the child retaliate by stating "you aren't my mom/dad!".


We are taking families, breaking them up, and reshaping them at an astounding rate and all I can think of is the effect it has on the children.

Now, I have a good friend that has remarried to a wonderful woman. His children adore her as she does them.
Obviously each situation is different and not all turn out like mine, but overall the results are the same.
Anymore, a child having the same and only two parents for the duration of their upbringing seems to be going the way of the dinosaur.

With that being said, I (hopefully) now retire my angst,ire, and depressions on this subject and look forward to 2006 being a year where I can have a more upbeat outlook on life and postings that will reflect that.

All I want for Christmas

VW has created a new "Super Car" that is extremely fast and extremely expensive.
I'll let the story speak for itself.

Our long national need for a car with more than 1,000 horsepower and costing more than $1 million has finally been answered.

If a Volkswagen Bugatti Veyron in your driveway with a bright red bow around it this Christmas, it's because the 16-cylinder monster doesn't go on sale until after its debut at the L.A. auto show next month.

The Veyron has a seven-speed transmission and will go 0 to more than 60 mph in 2.5 seconds and 0 to 188 mph in 14 seconds and has a top speed of 253 mph, meaning you don't want to be putting that bad boy in the wrong gear and stepping on the wrong pedal at the mall.

The car runs on special tires because it chews up regular tires, and if it breaks down, VW will bring someone over from Europe to do the repairs because ol' Ed down at the Gas 'n' Go probably isn't up to it.

If you get in on the ground floor, there's a certain amount of exclusivity because VW, when its assembly line gets fully rocking, will make about 300 a year and in the United States they will be sold at only half a dozen dealerships.

The Veyron has scoops and spoilers and swooping lines and looks — and this is meant as a compliment — like the fantasy of every 15-year-old, would-be car designer sketching intently away during history class.

The car has not met with universal acclaim. ``It's a complete waste of time and money,'' one German auto industry analyst told The Wall Street Journal.

And Volkswagen believes that Veyron owners won't drive the cars much at all, that they will treat them as works of art. If the Veyron flops, it indeed may become a rare, almost one-of-a-kind car for which wealthy collectors might vie for. But having a car just sit there, even if it's in a secure, climate-controlled garage, doesn't seem terribly different, other than kind and degree, from putting your '78 Ford LTD station wagon up on blocks in the back yard.

So why did Volkswagen, founded in the 1930s to produce inexpensive cars for working-class Germans, wind up building the world's fastest, most powerful, most expensive car? Because VW's then-CEO, Ferdinand Piech, scion of a famous auto-making family, wanted to, that's why.

The Journal says he has a Veyron on order for his wife. Surely your spouse will want to do likewise. Act fast; 45 have already been spoken for.


I'll take two.

A "thank you" for all of the emails I got this year

My heartfelt appreciation goes out to all of you who have taken the time and trouble to send me "forwards" over the past 12 months. Thank you for making me feel safe, secure, blessed, and wealthy.

Extra thanks to whoever sent me the one about rat shit in the glue on envelopes 'cause I now have to go get a wet towel every time I need to seal an envelope. Also, I scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.

Because of your concern I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains.

I no longer drink Pepsi or Dr. Pepper since the people who make these products are atheists who refuse to put "Under God" on their cans.

I no longer use Saran wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer.

I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS.

I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.

I no longer go to shopping malls because someone might drug me with a perfume sample and rob me.

I no longer receive nor send packages by UPS or FedEx since they are actually Al Qaeda in disguise.

I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica, Uganda, Singapore, and Uzbekistan.

I no longer eat KFC because their "chickens" are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers

I no longer have any sneakers -- but that will change once I receive my free replacement pair from Nike.

I no longer have to buy expensive cookies from Neiman Marcus since I now have their recipe.

I no longer worry about my soul because at last count I have 363,214 angels looking out for me.

Thanks to you, I have learned that God only answers my prayers if I forward an e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.

I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl who is about to die in the hospital (for the 1,387,258th time)

I no longer have any money at all - but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Bill Gates is sending me for participating in his special email program.

I will use that money for the entry fee I need to be a courier for $ 1.8 million to deposit for the wife of a slain African dictator of which I will keep 10% for my trouble.

Yes, I want to thank you so much for looking out for me that I will now return the favor!

If you don't tell at least 144,000 people in the next 7 minutes about this posting, a large pigeon with a wicked case of diarrhea will use your head for target practice at 5:00 PM (EST) this afternoon. (I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my next-door neighbor's ex-mother-in-law's second husband's cousin's who is a beautician, or was that a person in training down at the kennel?...hhhmm!

Sadism vs. Masochism

This past weekend, and again today I took my children sledding.
Of course, being the "hip dad" that I am, I let myself be talked into giving it a go.
It's been years, nay EONS since I've hurtled myself down a snowy covered slope, riding upon a man-made vehical created for the sole purpose of cheating death again and again.

I mean, who in the world thought, "If I had something very slick, I could ride down this snowy hill and achieve break-neck speeds!"??

I'll admit, though, I had fun, except for the time the saucer I was riding in, turned me around backwards, allowing the ground to grab ahold of the lip thus ejecting me in a display not unlike the scene of a rag doll being tossed out a speeding car.


Next week, I'm takin the kayak.

Livin' la Small Town Loca

Ever since Jack Nicholson uttered these famous words, I've held them near and dear to my heart. They seem to emulate where I live very nicely.

I live in a small town of only 3500. I moved here about a decade ago from a town of about 35000. Needless to say, the move was like moving into another dimension entirely.

Before I ramble on, the answer to why I moved here is simple:I started a family with a gal from here. Otherwise, I probably would not have chosen this locale to exist in.

One would think a smaller town would be an ideal setting to live, and at first it seemed nice enough to raise a family in. But, now five years after my divorce, I find that this quaint little town is NOT the ideal place for a single person to reside in. (Although, this is one facet of what bugs the shit out of me about this place.)

Here, it seems like everyone knows your shit and has to voice their opinion on it.
I've never heard such complaining at work about the most trivial of topics.
When someone gets a raise either from years of service, or based on their performance, the comments I hear stem from jealousy and misunderstanding about how an actual factory, or any business is ran.

I am still an outsider here, but I stay because this is where my children are.
I actually half look forward to when one of the two occurs:either they turn 18 or their mum finds yet another new husband online and moves far far away.
Then and only then will I be free of this po-dunk hell hole and have the ability to move far from here.

More inkwork

Today I got the second of two planned tattoo's.
Both were in "honor/tribute/whatever" to my to kids.

Being a single dad with only visitation is a huge slap in the face, and getting inked with their actual handwriting was a kind of therapy for me. And, the boys thought it was an "awesome idea".

You always hear about tattoo enthusiasts getting their wives or girlfriends names (which is a stupid idea) or even their childrens named tattooed. It was while watching a show on A&E that I saw a guy getting a tattoo of his sons name after his son actually "signed" the mans chest that I thought "that's an awesome idea".

So now I have my 8 and 10 year old sons handwriting on my skin for all eternity and I couldn't be more happy.

I plan on adding more "therapy" as soon as funds allow.