eHarmony

eHarmony claims to be able to match people. They have some "29 dimension" matching system that promises results. I'm only interested in 3-dimensions.
(wait for it....................wait for it............)

So I figure "what the hell" and fill out the in-depth survey, which takes about half an hour.
I'll admit the questions are rather thought provoking and gives one a sense of "ok. maybe this'll get me somewhere ".

So after completing the survey, it takes about a minute (says so by those little progress bars at the bottom of screens that fill left to right).
With baited breathe I await the throngs of women that are about to be slung my way via internet, which in my case is easier than trying the local bar scene. Briefly, smalltown=(putting it as nice as possible)no dice.
Finally, the results pop up AND.....................................


Our matching system was not able to find any new matches for you right now.

However, we are always automatically searching for new matches for you. Several thousand people join eHarmony each day and our matching system evaluates each one of them within 24 hours to see if they are a great match for you.

We will notify you via email when matches are found or you can check your My Matches page at eHarmony whenever you like.

Our matching criteria, based on the 29 dimensions of compatibility, is extremely strict, and is what makes eHarmony a unique and powerful tool in finding your soul mate. We will keep searching and hope to find some wonderful matches for you soon.

So either I'm a bigger loser than I thought, or sites like these only promise what they cannot provide.
The voices in my head tell me to go with the latter.